The little things in life

Every so often Singapore throws some little funnies at us- here are some examples I felt compelled to snap.



'Horney Goat Weed' Not just a ridiculous name, but also a supplement for low libido...and sold in most Newsagents. mental. 



Subtle Accessories. Rubber duck earrings, so OTM

I don't think people in the UK believed me when i said this was a common sight

Is this man watering the (questionable) plants?

No, he's polishing the pavement. Obviously.

The influence of Asia

I'm sorry, but this is just cruel

Marks and Spencer's clinging onto the wintery dream

Dinner tonight

I'm SO CONFUSED its 32 degrees outside, aarrrrggghhh

How did I deal with these confusing seasonal messages? I bought a dressing gown and some winter Vegetable soup so I can at least go home and pretend.

More substantial post en route, but for now i'm off to see Skyfall, sadly not in my dressing gown.

XXX

In Paradise it Pours

Having a bad day at work? Is the weather forecast reminiscent of "The Day After Tomorrow", your boss making you want to punch, if not them, then yourself in the face?

Well in this post may you find some solace. Through these weird pre winter months, gold tinted and cashmere coated by magazines and shop windows the UK over there are always the ‘dark days’. Days as pointless and unwelcoming as that space that no one can quite reach behind the fridge. Days when you idly dream of life in warmer climates, with longer days where you go from office to bar without even needing to remove your tights...because "what are tights?!" Well delete those images straight away. Because in paradise, its ‘rainy season’.

I won’t bore you with the scientific facts of rain, you all know how it works (and to be honest my interpretation would be a diagram drawn in geography at primary school). Just think, constant, heavy, and somehow still humid, rain. So when the days drag on and the tube is rammed, know that for once- you’ve actually got it good, nay, great. You may embrace this wintery weather with cosy clothes, wrap up warm for the walk from house to pub, where the worst that can happen to you is an endearing red nose which will convert to rosy cheeks as you set up camp by the fire with a roast and a glass of red and, if the pubs up to scratch, a politically incorrect game of scrabble. Save money with nights on the sofa comforted by pizza and a box set, drink tea that is not green. If these morsels of autumnal goodness are not enough, and the "extra winter layer" has taken hold a little sooner than you hoped, the end is not nigh as just over the horizon, with Pippa Middleton prepping the nation, lies the pre holiday holiday season. Kicking off with Halloween. The holiday that morphs with age from an innocent excuse to dress up and pitch up at strangers houses at night, to a less innocent excuse to dress up and pitch up at strangers houses at night.

Not your cup of tea? Well get your fill of X factor, have some bangers and mash and see the week through with the illuminating, heart warming knowledge that 5 days later its BONFIRE NIGHT Wellies, gloves, scarves, hats, fire, mulled wine, sparklers, fireworks, embarrassing dads, toffee apples, warm flattering skin by fire light.... I’m going to have to stop myself there, before I start a facebook event inviting people to our apartment on the 5^th to huddle around candles and bob for apples in the kitchen sink. (this might happen)

See its not all bad, good times are hiding at the end of the long weeks, and as I am cautious not to use the C word in October..."holidays are coming". So tactfully plan some sickies to get you through the rest of November, perfect your roast, devote to and then publicly dismiss reality TV and before you know it you’re over the final hurdle.



Bonfire night 20122 Mum Brother Me



setting the scene in the back garden

Apples bobbing

Back in Singapore we will sit out the rain finding comfort in the fact that the shops still follow western seasonal trends- yep that’s right, Zara is religiously displaying knee high boots, coats, hats and faux furs- the whole shebang, so we can still go and play dress up and pretend the leaves are browning. Failing that I’m going to go and take bark prints from palmtrees with orange and brown crayons.

So take my word, the grass is not always greener, its sometimes just wetter. I’m sure there are others in this neck of the woods echoing my sentiments. Therefore for the next few weeks I am going to make it my mission to find rain worthy activities to emmerse ourselves in in Singapore. We all need a little light at the end of the tunnel!

Speak Soon

XXX

Casino Crimes

I do not have a gambling problem. I have a problem with gambling. 

I'm not sure if it was premature excitement for the pending release of Skyfall, or an urgent need to do something reckless and extravagant after returning to Singapore from  the UK. But let me warn you now before you get your glad rags on. Marina Bay Sands Casino is NONE of the above, and by striking down each of my excitable preconceptions one by one I shall try and explain why. 

Marina Bay Sands

GLAMOUR?

Call me naive (but then I am a child of the 80s) to me casinos render images of mysteriously wealthy men in dinner jackets, beautiful women by their sides, offering nothing but promise should things go your way, fast cars and cigars.  High stake tables, perhaps the odd international criminal and you're next martini arriving before you even have time to scan the room for a waitress. I'll be honest, my limited experience of casinos was more accurately very drunken, often at the end of a night out and required membership for entry which anyone could apply for at the door. There was usually free breakfast, and embarrassing drunks taking risk to new highs (or lows?) as Jack Daniels began to make decisions for them.

illusions of grandour

NONE of these comfortable stereotypes even begins to paint a picture of Marina Bay Sands Casino. 

All elements of exclusivity are stripped away on arrival, the glamorous exterior and expensive surrounding shops provide a visual siren call to those with a wedge and a dangerous trap for those who leave with winnings. The cash machines only spit out $100 bills so if you don't want the temptation in your pocket, take money out elsewhere first. Casino goers are then herded like cattle to get into the 'gambling pit'. The cliental is obvious from this point. A mix of tourists popping in for a look around (think socks and sandals/ bum-bags/ I <3 SG T-shirts) local labourers straight off the work site, Expats with nothing better to do, rich Chinese business men, and in abundance (which is actually very sad to see) hundreds of men (and women) on their own, who sit for hours on end loosing all of their money on hope and addiction. Entry to the casino if free, unless you are Singaporean, in a conscious effort to try and clamp down on the prevalent issue of gambling in the country, they must pay $100 entry. Sadly however this results in people going to the casino for '24 hours shifts' until they are thrown out by security, to get the most out of the $100 surcharge. 

try to spot a waitress

The main hall is MASSIVE with sections dedicated to specific budgets, the fruit machines, low budget roulette and electronic machines are absolutely packed with an odd mix off clearly agitated settlers and excitable tourists chucking down chips for fun. But before your eyes are able to focus on the chaos, your senses are abused in a different way all together. The casino allows people to smoke EVERYWHERE. Ashing on the floors, the chairs, on the carpet, on their laps... it is essentially an oversized ashtray, and where smoking areas outside clubs are one thing, people chaining to overcome the stress of not regaining a dollar they loose creates a slightly gloomy atmosphere.

OUR EXPERIENCE

Off we trotted to the casino planing to have a few drinks, play a bit of black jack, and hopefully come back at least breaking even, but if not having a fun, evening and a couple of drinks. I failed on all these fronts. 5 minutes in, $100 down on roulette, we made an informed decision that guessing numbers was not where we were destined to make our millions. Instead we would guess cards. Off to the pontoon tables we went, finding one of the cheapest options which was $25 minimum bets- blink- gone was another $200. At this point I retired, it was a short gambling career, and I foolishly then started to think about what else $300 could have got me- bad idea.

Brad played on and didn't do too badly. We shared the table with another English guy and his girlfriend, neither of whom really seemed to have any big wins on the cards 

(pardon the pun), or a criminal history- this upset me. At one point an older Chinese man bowled over and threw down a $1000 bill on our table and got involved. After noticing the lack of challenge we provided, he switched to trying to teach us all, got bored and then left- taking the majority of the chips on the table with him. Maybe he was in a gang? That would be exciting. 

What I found bizarre is that it is impossible to get a drink in the casino, there is no visible bar when you are sat in the middle and you are reliant on about 3 waitresses who walk around to try and bring you something to your table. There is however free water, tea, coffee and Milo on tap for the more hardcore in need of caffeine fixes yet wanting to maintain focus- it is more like a library full of caffeine pumped students cramming the night before an exam than the Hotel de Paris I was expecting. Oh well, I think Brad broke even (I had lost track) so after about half an hour we went for a walk around. 

"Sian did you bring a big handbag?"

We put some money in a machine that flashed a lot and played a little tune every time it stole form us, claiming to be monopoly. This was not monopoly.

Then a woman was sick in a bin.

After this, we decided to call it a night- we needed a drink, and to be honest it would be easer to find a water cooler in the sahara than a G&T in the casino...I did get 2 free Milos out of the evening though. Or if you look at it another way, 2 $150 Milos. burgh. 

Ok I know I sound like a massive scrooge. But there is a part of me that thinks with Casino's you pay for an 'experience' you go to Vegas, and you expect the trimmings. If we felt indulged, enjoyed sumptuous surroundings and could settle down with drinks and a sense of healthy competition I don't think I would mind loosing money, if I had a good night out, instead it was more like wasting money to pass the time.

My advice, if you go? Go with friends. Go with a limit. Go prepared. Go drunk.

If like me you had slightly unrealistic ideals of a casino, I hope this will set your expectations on a more realistic level. Don't think Casino Royale, think RatRace, and if you want to feel like Daniel Craig, buy some tight blue swimming trunks and get a mate called M.

XXX

London's Calling

Some of my favourites

Back in a week

XXX

Batu Batu Paradise without the Pressure.

A few weeks ago we spent the weekend at the breathtaking boutique resort Batu Batu- a private Island a boat ride away from Mersing, Malaysia. I was desperate to write a post about it on return, but couldn't help but think I was perhaps basking in post holiday rose-tinted reverie. So I let it sink in went back to work and the rigmarole of day to day life with the aim of providing a more level headed review. What's happened in that period of time? Well, nothings changed and Batu Batu has comfortably secured itself as my 'happy place'.

Our memories of Batu Batu are blissful and real. When the stresses of work get the better of me its the calming crystal clear waters, subtle morning glow, and undisturbed horizons that I still flitter back too to regain equilibrium. Here I aim to write honestly, yet not to give too much away, for as the trailer of a good movie should, I want to encourage you all to experience this unique, utopia for yourselves. 

Batu Batu Home Page

Travel from Singapore

Condo to Coral in 3 and a half hours. We couldn't even get to Edinburgh from London in the time. All you need to arrange for yourself if travelling from Singapore is transport to the port in Mersing. We were recommended a private driver who picked us up at 7am, we slept in the car, and woke up in Mersing, in just 3 hours even during Hari Raya. This was safe, efficient and affordable at $150 each way for your own space and no queues, definitely worth the money. Coaches and mini bus hire are also available. Details of our driver 'Wan the Taxi man' can be found at the end of the post. *

Staff from Batu Batu meet you at the port and you are promptly ushered toward a private boat, nothing too fancy but it goes hell for leather and they provide life jackets for Children. This in itself is a luxury.

Farewell Mersing

Arranging the 'logistics'

Captain Batu Batu wasn't ready to give up his previous life as a coach driver, not without that seat.

Hello Batu Batu

 The Resort

There are beach resorts you can travel to where you expect (and pay) for luxury, and by luxury I mean textbook opulence, robotic staff and activities to fill every waking hour sandwiched between dining and drinking facilities worth travelling for alone. Now we are not ones to shy away from a bit of over indulgence, perhaps we could be accused of swaying towards it, with our last trip to the Banyan Tree in Bintan setting a high benchmark. However the air of simplicity, natural calm and the quality of everything your senses stumble upon in Batu Batu is something I truly believe money cannot buy. 

Nothingness

Whether other confess to this or not, with many 5 star reorts I often feel the presence of an unidentified pressure. Whether its on myself, other guest or the staff to maintain a certain standard and front I'm unsure, but there is something so often in the air. Yes its nice to 'dress' for dinner, have a cold towel at the raise of a hand and a wine list thicker than the yellow pages...but sometimes you just want to be. Not to have to wear a collar and long trousers to dinner, or to think you may be judged for literally mopping your plate clean...

This is not an issue at Batu Batu. Our stay evoked a sense of 'staying with friends'. (ok, if those friends were the Bransons) The entire resort adn staff resonate with warmth and personality. No one will bat an eyelid if you chose to come to dinner in flip flops and a tshirt, if you want to have wine and a cocktail at the same time. The friendly staff will pop over and chat to you, but there is no sense of hovering to clear your table for the next seating. Some may feel iclined to moan that a waiter is not a cough away- but give them a wave and they'll jog on over with a smile and fingers crossed, another bottle. Don't however be worried that the quality of your stay is by any means treated in a lax manner, everything from the towels to the bread rolls are of a very high quality. A mint on your pillow and complimentary chauffeurs are one thing but Batu Batu strive for a new level of luxury, in a broader interpretation of the word. Not necessarily 'more indulgent' but more normal. They have achieved this not by adding anything, but by taking something away. I would describe Batu Batu as Nuveau Luxury, Clean, uncomplicated, eco friendly ... Paradise without the pressure.

Pool and restaurant from afar

Dining at Sea

capturing the capturing of the moment

Weekend White Lines

hectic

Why bother going to the Spa when they just pop over to your villa

edge of the world

Rustic looking walkways lead you to hidden villas and secluded beaches

Et Voila

1 way in 1 way out

Beautiful, 24 hours. 

The Villas

I must be honest with you, I was unsure what to expect with the Villas as the pictures on the website really do not do them justice. With Batu Batu being so new I can only presume they were taken at stage of completion, and therefore appear to somewhat lack a personal, lived in touch- ubiquitos with the rest of the resort.

No Neighbours

I can however assure you that in keeping with the rest of the island, the villas do not disappoint. Incredibly spacious, light and well air conditioned, each villa provides a unique view of the South China Sea. Thoughtfully keeping the main feature of the villa, that view, as the uninterrupted focal point. They are tastefully decorated in neutral colours with devouring duvets, feather soft pillows and gorgeous eco friendly beauty products. Walking into your villa almost feels like life switches into soft focus. Serenity is the understated theme and stress seems like a foreign word. 

Morning Rays

TVs are provided but only play DVDs (selection at Reception) and the mini bar is full of essentials not extravagance. The rooms feel like a natural extension of the Island, with their rustic appearance and uncomplicated finish, yet offer unexpected peace that no star rating could encompass.

One of my favourite parts of the day on holiday is padding out of the shower, feeling clean, wrapping your sun kissed skin in a too large white towel and returning to the chapter that you didn't quite finish by the pool. Insert into that equation the devine products supplied at Batu Batu from Malin Gotez, with Betgamot, Lavender, and Peppermint scents delighting your senses and softening your skin you almost won't want to unwrap yourself to get changed for dinner (even if it is into shorts and Tshirt)

Malin and Goetz are eco friendly organic products from a NY based Duo available online here

Island Galavanting

If you are looking for Water sports, Kids clubs and jam packed beach front bars, Batu Batu is not where you'll find it. When you do feel the urge to work off your breakfast however there are plenty of activities which utilise the natural surroundings and provide no disturbance to other guests. Activieties include snorkelling, kayaking and a nature trail around the Island, oh and sandcastle making...obviously. We went snorkelling twice as the glass like see provides a perfect window to watch the fish "just hanging out", we even spotted a turtle. The Island also has its own in house naturist, perfect for any nature buffs out there who want to go exploring the tropical island. See his blog Here

  

  The Food

 For fear of not doing it the justice it deserves I will say as little as possible about the food. Belgain head Chef Evert Onderbeke knocked up some of the most delicious food we have tasted. Perhaps exaggerated by the fact that you just don't expect it in such a remote location, and you can smell the evening meals being prepared whilst loungin by the pool, excrutiating tastebud torture at its best.

The flavours and aromas are a common topic of conversation of guests waiting in anticipation for the next surprises. The menus are varied but limited enough not to leave your brain frazzled and overcome with indecision. When you go, trust me- you'll understand. I took some pictures in a meak attempt to convey our satisfaction, so for now, they will have to do.

sorry I was too late

...and again

 ...

The Perfect Long weekend getaway I hope this has been enough to tempt you to visit for yourselves. I can see us revisiting this gorgeous pocket of paradise for many years to come...

Until next time Batu Batu

XXX

*Details of driver to come